day 1296

So it's been 1296 days since I started sharing my life on the internet. That's about 3.5 years since a 14 year old boy attempted to cook some eggs on a thursday morning and wrote about it. 3.5 years since that same boy got the stomach flu and decided that the world needed to know. 3.5 years since he wrote about absolutely everything that would happen in a day hoping that at least one small part of it might have poetic or comedic merit.

and I would hope that since then two things would have happened:

Thing 1. The things I'm sharing actually do have some emotional merit to others, and they are not merely a plot analysis of my day.

and

Thing B. That the things I write about, even if they do not fit the criteria of thing 1, can be said in a way eloquently enough that they can trick others into thinking that they do fit the criteria of thing 1.

I don't know why I feel like I need to put my feelings into words. Even when life is quite uneventful and I don't feel like I'm feeling anything new, I want to tell about it. So I write, and I just hope that even if the feeling I write about is not anything spectacular, it is something that people can relate to. That my feelings are something that people can learn something from.

That sounds really self-absorbed. Like I said, what I feel most of the time is nothing interesting, nothing particularly extravagant--but I still feel that maybe something about it's simplicity gives it merit.

and it feels good to get it out there. Even if it means nothing to anybody else.


And right now I think I am feeling alive. I'm terrified of how my life is about to change, but at the same time excited. Excited that tomorrow I will be buying all the new things I'll need for living without parents. Terrified because I'll be completely on my own. But I know that I'm feeling something, that I'm not just numb, which I think is the worst feeling in the world.

I'm alive. and I'm going to college. and I'm moving away from my family and friends. and I know that things are going to change. but at the same time I know that everything is going to work out fine. I am confident that everything is going to work out great.

love always,
jim.


by the way, I decided that I want to start writing letters to people from school. So if you would like me to write to you, leave me your address, or send me a letter at:

292 Allison Hall
Ft. Collins, CO 80521

and I'll send you my writings, ranting, drawings, and whatever else I feel like.

Miss you all already.