I don't know what I'm going to do: Tell me [s']more about it.

Right now I really have no idea what I am going to do with my life. I'm writing stories for literary journals and I'm considering how I could work after college but I really have no clue.

However, I found this encouraging:

When Sylvester Graham invented the Graham cracker in 1822 he marketed it as some sort of miracle cracker that could cure diseases and greatly boost the immune system. It was the center of a health regimen Graham came up with to suppress "unhealthy carnal urges."

Graham crackers don't really do that.


So I guess what I'm really saying is. . . maybe my writings aren't going to be as great as I would hope, and maybe my career will be mediocre at best.

But I hope that someday somebody will cover it with chocolate and melted marshmallow and think that it is pretty good.

My discovery about college. . .

Those who drink alcohol seem to meet so many more people.




Why can't cherry coke induce a relationship?

today. . .

I find it strange how poetic this night is. It's strange how much things can change, but even when everything is different the songs you listen to, and the books you read, and the movies you watch still mean the exact same thing to you that they did when you first encountered them.

But it's bigger somehow. It's like when you first experience something, you throw a rock into a pond. And the ripples start off small. And they grow and grow and grow. And even by just looking at one ripple, you instantly remember what it was like when you threw the stone into that pond, but it's bigger. It's not just a tiny splash, it's a ripple that is now covering a huge area.

Anyway, today I was looking around, and all I could see was ripples. I remembered all the things that make life wonderful. I remembered all the play productions and choir concerts, the nights at the dairy queen, and the off hours filled with Mario Kart and Aqua. I remembered all the things that make me, me. And it was nice to remember those things today.

It's weird to think that even as I look at these ripples, I'm throwing more rocks into the water.

The story of my life. . .

Once upon a time,
there was a boy named Jim.

One day, it was a Tuesday I believe, Jim arose from bed and went to his visual art class where he was instructed to take a test. This test took thirty minutes. Then Jim was allowed to leave. This meant that on this particular morning Jim got out of class 45 minutes early.

Once Jim returned to his dormitory, he got breakfast, and the woman serving the breakfast said that James was a very nice name. He said "thank you very much," and returned to his room.

Upon arrival to his humble abode, Jim checked his email and received this message from the T.A. of his history class:

CLASS CANCELLED TODAY, TUESDAY, OCTOBER 9TH AT 2:00pm.

Jim then commenced to party like a rockstar for the rest of the day.


The End.

re: What?

I was reading old messages, and one was from you. And I remembered when you used to talk to us. That was before you were so far away. It seems so weird that you've cut yourself off from your past. I don't think I could ever do that. Move away and just leave everything and everyone behind. That's crazy. Completely crazy.

I could never do that.

Ever.

No freaking way.

the epistle to the stressed college student.

You are an idiot Jim Taggart.

You chose to study a subject in which there are no wrong answers--a subject that you believed allowed for endless possibilities and differing points of view. English? You thought that it was wonderful how much you could learn about yourself and about the universe from just thinking about things from different angles and from analyzing things in different ways. How much you could gain just from reading others' insights and pondering others' beliefs.

But what you didn't realize was that in a subject in which there are no wrong answers, there are no correct answers either. No matter how much you theorize, analyze, and consider; your opinion is still only an opinion. No matter how much you try and look at something a different way, you still can't find the "right" way. Your answer is just as much
"fluff" as the moron sitting next to you who theorizes that the fog is a metaphor for the downfall of Gregor's career when you clearly know that it is a metaphor for the loss of innocence or the evil of the machine age or any number of things.

But the truth is, in a subject with no answer, there can be no ultimate goal, or ultimate truth, or overall success. You just spend the whole time thinking, theorizing, analyzing, considering, annotating, reading, writing, formatting, studying in order to get nowhere.

In the end, no matter how much you've done all that, the only outlook you have is your perspective. And that perspective is only real to you. Nobody else will see it for what it is.

And your answer will never be right just as much as it will never be wrong.

It isn't an answer. It just an idea. Just a tiny squeak speaking out in a world where tiny squeaks all mix into one massive droning ROAR. A roar in which any individual squeak can't be deciphered from any other.

And you're a part of that, Jim. And you're just now realizing that everything you're striving for will make very little difference in the big picture. That your grades matter very little anymore. That tests don't measure who you are. That "right" answers shouldn't be used to define a person.

You're realizing that maybe all that matters is to be there; to have an 'answer'; to be a squeak within a ROAR; and to do whatever you can to be you.

Because in the end, even if you don't have it all figured out, you're you. And maybe that's the only end-goal that matters:

To speak.
To think.
To wonder.
To love and to be loved.
To eat, and sleep, and dream.

but most of all,

To be.

a change of me.

Hey everybody.

I've been reading some of my notes from over the past couple weeks. And I've noticed that some of them are really depressing and lame. I would delete them, but I don't really like doing that. I don't think I should change how things happen. I might think they are emo and not agree with them, but they were still me.

However, from now on, I want to be better.

I want to be a better friend. I want to be more encouraging. I want to be more positive.

And I want to be happy. and I want those around me to be happy.

Thus, I am changing some things.

First of all,

if there is ever anything you need. Tell me. I'd like to do whatever I can to help.

2nd

I've started a swear jar. I think my potty mouth has been bringing me down. So if you catch me swearing, please remind me that it costs 25 cents.

and 3rd

I want you all to know that I'm crazy about all of you guys. And I'd like to remind you all of that more.

So here is the first time.

You guys are wonderful friends. And I love you all oodles of noodles.



I hope you all have a wonderful day,
jim.

P.S.
It kind of feels like this is over optimistic. But I'm really serious. So if you could all hold me accountable, I'd appreciate it a lot.